Obstacles are a reality of life. They’ll come, they’ll go and some will seem too difficult to overcome. In which case, go around. 🙂
Unfortunately, going around isn’t always the best tactic though. Sometimes there’s more to be learned in the struggle of climbing and conquering that seemingly insurmountable rock than taking the easy path and walking around it.
When things got difficult for me in gymnastics, I replaced gymnastics for theater.
When things got challenging in dance, I focused more on theater.
When things get difficult in theater, I focus more on dance.
In all of these cases, going around made more sense at the time than getting so discouraged that I gave up, turned around and went home. But sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I’d laid my energy so directly into the challenge that it seemed as if there was no other option than plowing straight over the rock? Yes, maybe going around these challenges has been the better option – mainly because it has been just as scenic and stimulating as that first and initial challenge appeared to be. But what if it’s not? What if taking the easy way out was only that?
Life is choices. You make one choice and you lose out on another. You pick one path and you forever miss out on whatever laid the other way. Sometimes one way just has more obstacles than any other direction you could have gone. But that’s life. We’re not given a road map at the beginning of it telling us that “if you go to this place on this day you’ll meet the most amazing person to complement your unique personality.” But sometimes it really is the difference between that and sitting at home alone, eating ice cream.
Early successes can encourage easy discouragement later on in life. When I teach my students, I want to protect them from the damage that “failure” can inflict – self-doubt, self-questioning and disappointment. But the reality is, if you learn how to deal with these uncomfortable feelings early on, you’ll be less likely to collapse beneath them as a grown adult. For better or for worse, I learned early on that “hard work pays off.” But the true reality is, SOMETIMES IT DOESN’T! Sometimes you work so hard, put in an inordinate amount of hours, sacrifice blood, sweat and tears, for absolutely no pay-off at all.
And it’s the child who learns how to pick himself up and dust himself off early on who’ll survive these inevitable tests of fortitude.
No matter what you experienced as a child, whether you won every contest that was put in front of you or else seemingly failed at everything and are thereofre afraid to take risks as an adult, remember: YOU ARE NOT ALONE. We all experience disappointment. And loss. And regret.
And we all have the capacity to HEAL.
So, heal. And look again at that obstacle in front of you. It doesn’t look so giant anymore, does it?
Erika Diane 